Thursday, September 3, 2009

Mother's Not Welcome

Never been before heres a little bit about me to get you started.

So as Father's Day is this Sunday here in Australia, Grotbag's school hold a special Dad's Night before Father's Day where Dad's can go with their children to see some work they have done and also give their Dad's the cards and pressies they had made. It was from 6.30pm to 7pm in their class and Grotbag had no Dad to take. This happens to us all the time, as Hubby works away in the mines for 2 weeks and then is home for one week (one of the pitfalls) but luckily we have a great family network and so he had a few other replacements to pick from. He chose his Grandad (my Step-Dad) who was pleased as punch to be asked.

When I dropped Grotbag at school the day before the Dad's Night there were rumblings between the other Kindy Mum's. Knowing my predicament with Dad's Night they cautiously informed me that at the Pre-Primary Class across the playground, the teacher had put up a sign (yes she actually put one up for all to see) that read "Please note: Mother's are NOT welcome on Dad's night" I couldn't believe it. Really in this day and age where there is no such thing as a "normal" family that she could actually put up a sign to say that the Mother's were not welcome!

Imagine being in a situation where the Father of your child, for whatever reason, was unavailable to go to "Dad's Night" at the school and you had no other male figure in your child's life that could also go along. Now imagine having to tell your child that he can't go to school for Dad's Night, even with Mum because the Teacher said Mother's were not welcome. This could have well been the case for our family if we didn't have any other family close to us and it just makes me so mad. How insensitive!!

There are so many what if's like what if there is no Dad around because of separation, illness or because they have passed away. What if the child has two Mummy's or two Daddy's (can they both go?) - and I am sure you are thinking of a dozen more right now - that make the sign SO WRONG.

I am thankful that my child's teacher does not share the same mentality and welcomed any family member to go. Grotbag's Grandad was welcomed warmly and had a great time looking at all of Grotbag's school work.

There are so many family dynamics these days that consideration and sensitivity at these special night should be taken into account. As should we all have the same consideration and sensitivity to others in life.

Mother's and Father's should ALWAYS be welcomed when it comes to being a part of their children's lives.

Sure hope Grotbag doesn't get her for a teacher next year. I can feel my claws coming out now!!!

Grotbag & His Grandad


Sassy Chica said...

Mother...hmmmm, I can go in a million directions with tell me which you prefer?

Kidding, just wanted to let you know I was here and will stop by agian later!

Sassy Chica

Amanda said...

AHHH - can you tell I am new at this! Hadn't even finished writing the title and pressed enter! D'oh!
Hope you come back Sassy Chica!!!

Peterson Family said...

I hope that the teacher didn't realize that she would be excluding children because of that outrageous sign. Not all children have a male presence in their lives and they should be respectful of whatever family unit is in place!

Mary-Jane said...

That is ridiculous.

Lisa Anne said...

Super cute picture. You scared me for a moment, thinking I had forgotten about Fathers Day. Here in the States it's in June, I was still startled for a moment.


Sassy Chica said...

Ok now that I have read the full post, I agree with you that both parents should be invited to attend!

Sassy Chica


thanks for coming to visit me at SPEAKING FROM THE CRIB and becoming a follower! yeah!

The Grown-Up Child said...

That's really unbelievable. I'm surprised she didn't have at least one angry mother at her classroom door! Because you're right; lots of kids don't have dad's around. My husband is a firefighter and works 24 hour shifts. He's often not home for school activities and if that had been MY son in her class? Oh yes, the claws would have definitely come out!

MrsM said...

I agree with The Grown Up Child-I have to believe there was at least ONE mother pounding down that teacher's door! I certainly would have been. Some people just don't think before they do things.

Momma G.Love said...

Of course BOTH parents should be able to attend!

...stopping by from SITS...

Steph @ Stick It in the Fridge

Sonja said...

Stopping by from SITS!
I can't believe that teacher! I would have reported him/her to school.

Millennium Housewife said...

That was a really interesting post, we don't have daddy's night over here and I appreciate that it's to encourage dads to take an interest, but really! If a child's wellbeing is first and foremost then all this teacher is teaching is how to discriminate. That's the priority? You've sparked quite a debate here!

Amanda said...

Thanks for all your comments! I was at a dinner last night with a bunch of the kindy mums from our class and also the class Teacher. I asked her about it and she said that she didn't want to get involved and keeps out of the type of thing - fair play and also means that something must have been said for her to know what I was talking about. However I will be requesting that she is not Grotbag's teacher next year!

Sparkly Tiara said...

Oh boy, I'd be ropable, Amanda! My daughter's father is not in our lives at all (idiot) and she was so proud this morning to present me with all the little arts and crafty things she made both at kindy and daycare. Sure, they all still say Happy Father's Day, but she made them with love for ME! I've done a blog post on this, in fact, in which I thank them for being so sensitive to the needs of today's less traditional families.

Your school needs a good telling off!


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